what will you say

will you know what to say
when I look on astonished
by what the years
have taken away or
dragged into the waning light
of this blue winter night

will you know what to say
when I forgive all
I know you cannot give
without all that you knew
giving way

will you know what to say
when we’re done
with the pretense
that brought us here
against all sense
when I touch you in a way
that belies
all I tried to hide
with gestures
to dazzle and blind you
when a hint of your touch
will be enough
to swipe away
such confessions
admitting all
but the mention
that here we are again
singing of beginnings
when we both know
it can only be the end


so long

it’s been so long
since I’ve heard
anything new
of your days
or your dreams
or the nights
in between
so though it hurts
I must conclude
I don’t know you


I saw you in that car
parked in the dark
your face a half lit moon
gazing at the screen
your finger hovering
ready to delete and move on

Your face reflected a world
of pain and joy
suspended in a void
an alternate universe
being destroyed

I envied your strength
to pinch it to black
as I wished I had done
a whole lifetime back
when I could still hope
time would erase and replace
the empty space 
with new wonders
instead of a glowing
screen gone blank

swept clean

leaves on pavement
shrivelled and drying
stark only in contrast
to the grey where they lie
while traffic and footsteps
run over and by

tomorrow the rain
will wash the stains
and any distracting
colours remaining
and stares will be dull
and blank again
as my thoughts
without wishes of you

until now

you said you felt awful
for what you did to me
but nothing you did
ever made me feel bad
only what you didn’t


I’ve twisted tendons
and callused my soles
from searching to meet you
on softer terrain
I’ve tripped up my words
and torqued my soul
from trying to meet you
on higher planes

But you like to lie
close to the ground
to limit perspectives
to single use views
taper expectations
to scraps of paper
thrown clear of anticipation
And any yearning
they may birth
crawling, trawling
scraping up traces
that may promise more
than what has been earned.

So I’ll tear up my efforts
useĺessly sown
in barren dirt
devoid of worth
beyond burying hurt
And never again
set sights or foot
on this trodden plain


Your kind words
swept my heart clean
of those verbs
that tied it to a past
shifted to lesser
than platonic planes
divided by mountains of time
The sky is now all we share


Though it came
without rain or relief
By the end of October
I knew it was all over

Silence hung
like a threat
hunched in a stand off
between the earth
and the clouds

Leaves turned brown
leaning far down
begging the wind
to release them

Birds gathered and scattered
Words ceased to matter
Waiting for distraction
was the only action
of defiance left
for those bereft
of hope and rope enough
to pull or swing from

Come November
and even leaves
cannot remember
what it felt to be green
reaching for blue sky
as I cannot recall
how or why
I reached for you
Just the hurt and
the taste of dirt
that came with falling

skin to skin

Let us lie
skin to skin
and abide
’till colours and lines
blur with time
and all it has taken back from us
‘Till we find
solace in grey
at the end of the day
and shun the brighter rays
that blanch us from its horizons

Let’s not talk of things
we cannot change
Of all those mistakes
we should have made
while we still believed
we could rise with the tide
and find higher ground

Let our artifacts gather around
and life’s lessons tie us down
Let the dust pile on high
while we lie
skin to skin
breathing out
breathing in
Breathing out
our love’s
last sigh

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